24 is the new 25

I am a riddle wrapped in an enigma. You're just going to have to deal with that

Thu, 10 Dec 2009 20:11:43 -0500

Halfway through the four-hour bus ride to DC, but I’m ready to get off now. Boltbus’s wifi is such a tease - I spent the first hour of the trip *willing* hulu to stop buffering last week’s Parks

GPOYW - “in need of a pedicure” edition

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 22:59:35 -0500

GPOYW - “in need of a pedicure” edition

This made me so happy. I went, “Ah!” out loud. I...

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 13:50:16 -0500

This made me so happy. I went, “Ah!” out loud.

I definitely posted this original picture last year. I don’t care who’s in the White House - if you stand in front of a huge Christmas tree in fancy outfits, it will appear on this blog.

He’s lying about the man bits though. I swear.

peachfuzz:

This one’s also for megan. Because if there’s one thing megan likes as much as seeing man bits on my blog, it’s Christmas music. And believe me, she likes seeing man bits on my blog A LOT. As in, it makes me uncomfortable sometimes.

Anyway, the photo may a tad out of date, but the music is just as good this year as it was last year. Get this episode and 13 others here:

http://www.peachfuzz.net/peachfuzzcast/

peachfuzzcast episode 10: Music for surviving the holidays.

This is a holiday mix you can use to pre-empt that Starbuck’s christmas album at your next holiday gathering. Whether you’re with friends, family or co-workers, nobody should have to sit through more than one Jingle Cats song.

01. Sesame Street - Bert and Ernie’s Christmas Gift Part I - Christmas Eve On Sesame Street (1978)
02. Low - Just Like Christmas - Christmas (1999)
03. Violent Femmes - American Music - Why Do Birds Sing? (1991)
04. The Ramones - Merry Christmas (I Don’t Want To Fight Tonight) - Brain Drain (1989)
05. Elvis Costello - What’s so funny about peace love and understanding? - Armed Forces (1979)
06. The Kinks - Father Christmas (1978)
07. Waitresses - Christmas Wrapping (1982)
08. I’m From Barcelona - This Boy (feat. Loney, Dear) - Let Me Introduce My Friends (2006)
09. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - In This Home On Ice - Clap Your Hands Say Yeah (2005)
10. Yo La Tengo - It’s Christmas Time - Merry Christmas From Yo La Tengo (2002)
11. Sesame Street - Bert And Ernie’s Christmas Gift Part II - Christmas Eve On Sesame Street (1978)
12. The Beach Boys - Merry Christmas, Baby - The Beach Boys’ Christmas Album (1964)
13. Death Cab for Cutie - Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) - Maybe This Christmas Tree (2004)
14. Low - Blue Christmas - Christmas (1999)
15. Porn Orchard - This Holiday Season (Peter Murphy & Tom Waits Impressions) - The Mother of All Flagpole Christmas Albums (1992)
16. The Bird and the Bee - Carol of the Bells (2007)
17. The Beach Boys - White Christmas - The Beach Boys’ Christmas Album (1964)
18. Low - Little Drummer Boy - Christmas (1999)
19. Cranes - Happy Christmas (War is Over) (1996)
20. Sesame Street - Bert and Ernie’s Christmas Gift Part III / Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas - Christmas Eve On Sesame Street (1978)
21. The Beach Boys - Morning Christmas - The Beach Boys’ Christmas Album (1964)
22. Johnny Mercer & Margaret Whiting - Baby, It’s Cold Outside (1949)
23. Stephen Colbert & Willie Nelson - Little Dealer Boy - A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All! (2008)
24. William S. Burroughs - The Junky’s Christmas - Spare Ass Annie And Other Tales (1993)
25. Nullsleep - Silent Night - nullsleep.com

Subscribe via iTunes:

http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewPodcast?id=284437993

Glee Dreaming

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 10:31:44 -0500

Last night I dreamed the fall finale to Glee. Not a dream where Glee characters made random cameos - no, this was ‘the show,’ in my REM sleep. This was sectionals. I dreamed song choices, choreography, sub-plots, the whole she-bang.

The only thing that seemed out of place was when Mr. Schue left his awful wife for yours truly. But hey, I wasn’t going to question it - I thought it made perfect sense as a storyline…

Floss, floss! My kingdom for some floss!

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 18:42:07 -0500

Some little piece of obnoxiousness wedged itself between my back teeth this morning, and for the life of me I can’t dislodge it, though I’ve been trying with my tongue and various office objects all day.

I need some f’ing floss like whoah.

Non-Christmas Shopping Question

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 15:49:40 -0500

Where can I find a Hawaiian shirt on short notice in NYC?? I need my costume for this year’s murder mystery party, and I’m running out of time. The cheaper, the better obviously…

Thank you!

A Very Gilly Christmas

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 12:33:52 -0500

A Very Gilly Christmas:

This just made my day

The revolution will be fashionable

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 20:51:00 -0500

I had a terrifying vision today of my possible future. Like The Christmas Carol, but with aging account people instead of nightmare-visiting ghosts.

My agency recently started a project on which we’re working with several other agencies – a media company here, a PR firm there. All around one big table, trying to be creative by consensus. Good times.

So this woman walks into our brainstorm session today. She works for the large dinosaur agency, the Goliath to our tiny-but-with-a-can-do-spirit David. The Sterling Cooper to our Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce. While I’ve been working on the account for more than a month, I’ve never met this woman because she has been on vacation.

This woman is me, older.

She was pleasant enough, smart with insightful comments about strategy and clever in her creative tactics. But holy dorkiness. To start, she was wearing corduroy pants, which is dangerous to begin with, but especially for a woman of a certain age (and by that, I mean early thirties) whose inner thighs haven’t seen daylight in years. Luckily, we weren’t witness to the dreading zhooshing that threatens all corduroy-wearers as she came in before and left after me. Topping that, she sported a cable-knit sweater, the color of which can only diplomatically be described as “oatmeal,” with a striped button-down peeking out from the crew-neck collar.

A easy-to-manage bob topped her look, with glasses just fashionable enough to be called ‘edgy’ by a middle-aged fashion editor in Good Housekeeping.

I was wearing this exact same outfit. Straight-leg jeans replaced the cords, and my sweater was Merino wool from Banana, not cable-knit from Coldwater Creek, but the gist – the essence, if you will – was the same. And it struck me. I am a mom. Like, a mom. I wear things because they’re sensible, and they wash well, and I can eat a footlong sub in them and no one will be the wiser. While I’ve convinced myself that the collars I pop are preppy, in a post-college world they are, in fact, decidedly suburban. I’m Chicos chic, not J.Crew casual. This isn’t to say I don’t want this one day – I’m going to be an awesome dorky mom (I learned from the best, after all – which to all you out there with the elusive ADM – know that’s a compliment). I just don’t want to be one now.

Starting tomorrow, I’m reclaiming my youth. Patterned tights! Skinny jeans!! V-necks!!!

Me: I really need to learn that the cure to a stomach ache is not always food.

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 18:15:34 -0500

Me: I really need to learn that the cure to a stomach ache is not always food.
Tall Megan: I think it's safe to say that it's usually NOT the cure.
Me: And yet, it's my standard go to. I think I just automatically equate stomach pains with hunger pangs... Maybe my pants are too tight. I wish the people sitting around me would leave so i can unbutton my pants.

Mmm, chain restaurants… What does it say about me that I...

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 13:40:00 -0500

Mmm, chain restaurants…

What does it say about me that I got mildly excited when I heard this ad (and helpful accompanying web banner) pop up on my pandora today? Half-price apps at the bar at T.G.I. Friday’s! There’s one near my house in Wisconsin, and you can bet that after ten days with my family, I’ll be running as fast as I can to a bar anyway. Might as well snack on some delicious loaded potato skins while I’m there…

Oh, and don’t hate on the 98 Degrees Christmas tunes. “This Gift” was my jam when it came out.

I’m not sure why, but I’m typing like a secretary...

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 11:15:39 -0500

I’m not sure why, but I’m typing like a secretary from the fifties today. Hands perched in threatening claws above my keyboard, raising each finger unnecessarily high before swooping down and attacking each letter, making a loud, satisfying “tap” with each strike. I feel like I should be sporting a bouffant, chain smoking Lucky Strikes and fending off advances from my boss who calls me “sweetheart.”

tap-tap-tap-tap-tap-tap-TAP-TAP-TAP-TAP-TAPTAPTAPTAPTAPTAP

(via)

SNL Digital Short - Shy Ronnie & Rihanna

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 10:05:46 -0500

SNL Digital Short - Shy Ronnie & Rihanna

truestory: There’s something so poetic about Tebow crying onto...

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 10:04:14 -0500

truestory:

There’s something so poetic about Tebow crying onto his John 16:33 eye black.

"He’s from Honduras - that’s not even a state!"

Sat, 05 Dec 2009 19:57:16 -0500

“He’s from Honduras - that’s not even a state!”

- Bitter Florida fan, protesting a friend’s right to taunt her team’s embarrassing loss

Snow!!

Sat, 05 Dec 2009 16:34:31 -0500

It finally started snowing!!!

Not to brag or anything,

Sat, 05 Dec 2009 11:10:18 -0500

But I just changed the light bulb in my living room All By Myself. Yeah, I know. I’m about to bust out some old school Destiny’s Child up in here. Independent Woman!

…Ok, I realize that might not really sound like a huge accomplishment, but I had to stand on a really high chair to do it! I could have fallen at any time. It was really scary. Whatever, you can’t steal my Beyonce-backed moment.

I really want a hot dog right now

Fri, 04 Dec 2009 18:46:36 -0500

Is that gross?

“Are you spinning a basketball?!?”

Fri, 04 Dec 2009 15:07:17 -0500

“Are you spinning a basketball?!?”

Jacqueline Kennedy and Bobby Kennedy (date unknown) I’ve...

Fri, 04 Dec 2009 14:49:00 -0500

Jacqueline Kennedy and Bobby Kennedy (date unknown)

I’ve been reading Jackie & Bobby, A Love Story, detailing a now-mostly acknowledged affair between Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis and her slain husband’s brother, Bobby.

An anecdote from one of the many friends and acquaintances confirming the dalliance recalled seeing a prominently displayed signed photo of RFK in Jackie’s apartment in New York City, while pictures of JFK were nowhere to be found in the home. The friend suggested that people may talk when seeing a picture like that.

“I don’t care what people think,” she brazenly told her friend. “I would jump out a window for Bobby.”

I read that passage days ago, and it popped up in my head this morning while out for a run. What a fantastic statement. I mean, really. How many people would you jump out of a window for? How many people would jump out the window for you??

While I can confidently name a few for whom I’d risk the safety of my skeletal system, I wonder how many would say the same for me. What I do know is, I want someone who will say that about me forever. When he looks at me and thinks I’m beautiful. When I praise him in public. When I give him the last piece of pie without complaint. And I want him to say that about me when I’m acting like a bitch because I hate my job and I’m taking it out on him. When I’m whining like a child because I’m tired and my feet hurt and I haven’t gotten my way. I want someone who – no matter what – will be there. When it’s amazing and when it’s awful, he will want to be there for me and with me.

I haven’t found that yet – or if I have, I let it get away – but I’m hopeful for the future. Someone will find me, and when he does, we can jump out the window together.

(photo via)

“Who made me wear this awful ha-a-a-a-a-a-t? / Ooh girl,...

Fri, 04 Dec 2009 13:51:41 -0500

“Who made me wear this awful ha-a-a-a-a-a-t? / Ooh girl, it looks so ba-a-a-a-a-a-d!!!”

I haven’t actually heard any songs from Nick Jonas’s new side project, but Tall Megan says the single is disturbingly awesome, and she hates the Jonas Brothers, so I trust her opinion on this.

Also, I feel like “hat” and “bad” is something he would probably rhyme. Don’t you think?

(via fuckyeahjonasbrothers)